


Always You (don't need anything else)

by Emerald_Heart12



Series: A Perfect Day for Bananafish [Banana Fish Oneshots and AUs] [1]
Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Ash Lynx Needs A Hug, Domestic Fluff, Fluff, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Okumura Eiji is Good at Hugs, Rape Recovery, do the math
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-14
Updated: 2019-10-14
Packaged: 2020-12-07 16:08:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20978678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emerald_Heart12/pseuds/Emerald_Heart12
Summary: After his and Max's visit to Club Cod, Ash isn't as unaffected as he likes to pretend he is. Eiji picks up on it, and Ash can't ever refuse comfort from him.Prompt: "I will always choose you."





	Always You (don't need anything else)

**Author's Note:**

> Whoo, this is the first thing I'm posting for Banana Fish after it very kindly chewed up my heart, spat it out, and stomped on it. 
> 
> So, without further ado...

Eiji woke with a start, having heard huge, heavy gasps from beside him. 

Sure enough, Ash seemed to have just awoken from what was probably a nightmare. Even in the dark, Eiji could see the sheen of sweat that coated Ash’s face, reflecting the lamplight. 

Sitting up in his own bed, Eiji watched as Ash mechanically headed to the bathroom, leaving the door open as he splashed water on his face. 

Eiji’s eyes met Ash’s in the mirror. Ash froze up, then smiled, looking down to break eye contact. “Did I wake you?”

“Yes,” Eiji admitted. “I worry about you, Ash. You have these nightmares so often, I cannot help but worry.”

“‘Can’t’ is short for ‘cannot’,” Ash just said evasively. “I should get you more Sesame Street videos.”

“Ash . . .” Eiji sighed, then patted a spot on the bed next to him. “Sit with me.”

To Eiji’s relief, Ash didn’t hesitate to sit down with him. Or, for that matter, to gently rest his head on Eiji’s chest. “Your heartbeat’s slow,” Ash murmured, closing his eyes. 

“That’s because I’m calm right now,” Eiji said softly, running a hand gently through Ash’s hair. 

“I’m not,” Ash admitted softly, whispering the words into Eiji’s pyjama shirt. “Eiji . . .” he whispered, and despite everything, despite the fact that he’d heard it so many times, Eiji couldn’t help but marvel over the way Ash pronounced it, not quite Japanese-sounding with the harder pronunciation of each syllable, and filled with raw, unfiltered emotion. 

Eiji’s hands didn’t falter in Ash’s here. “I’m here for you, Ash,” he just said. “If you want to talk about it, I will listen.”

Ash tensed in Eiji’s arms for a moment, then relaxed. “Okay,” he whispered, pulling away slightly to sit up straighter, but he didn’t meet Eiji’s eyes. Eiji wasn’t sure Ash could, so he didn’t push. 

“Max and I . . .” Ash swallowed, then stared at the wall, seeming to distance himself from the conversation. “We went to this place called New World. On the outside, it’s a gay bar, but it’s really a cover for a child sex trafficking organisation.”

Eiji knew better than to say anything to interrupt Ash—who was still detached, looking at the wall as he spoke, as though the words that left his mouth weren’t his own. 

“The man in charge, Frank Sanchez—Froggy—was the one we needed to collect the information from. He was also . . . also one of the men who ‘took care of me’ when I was younger. Before even Marvin or Dino—Dino _ owned _ the sex ring it was a part of.”

Eiji gently lifted up one of Ash’s hands in his own, running a thumb over Ash’s knuckles, encouraging.

Ash shuddered, but continued, “He took pictures of all his clients and their ‘activities’,” Ash whispered. “And he made sure that almost every kid he sold off wouldn’t live for long enough to be able to expose him.”

“But you did,” Eiji said quietly. 

“Dino ended up taking me before that,” Ash said plainly. “I got lucky. Well, as lucky as being taken in by Dino was. Today when we saw him—I was hit with all those memories of the shit that happened there. The amount of times that bastard had his way with me, and how horrible it was for me afterward . . . I almost shot him. At first, it was just to threaten him, to scare him into giving us the photos we needed for evidence.”

“But you lost control,” Eiji concluded. 

Ash laughed impassively. “I lost control. Completely. It would have been _ so _ easy to shoot him—he was _ right there _ —I could have _ finally _ gotten away from him—that’s what I was thinking. If Max hadn’t come in then”—Ash shivered again—“I would have killed him, and I probably would have laughed about it. I would have found it _ funny_, Eiji. That’s fucked up, isn’t it? _ I’m _ fucked up, aren’t I?”

“Ash . . .”

Ash didn’t seem to hear him. “Maybe it wasn’t _ lucky _ that Dino got to me first. Maybe it would be better for us all if I hadn’t lived past—”

“_Aslan._” Eiji interrupted, and Ash finally snapped to his senses. “I’m happy . . . that you’re here now, Ash,” he said quietly. 

Ash snorted. “At least one of us is.” A pause. “Did you just call me . . .”

“Oh—sorry, I thought—”

A slow smile, a calmer one, made its way to Ash’s face. “I like hearing my name from you,” he said quietly. “Say it again.”

Eiji almost hesitated. “Aslan.”

“Again.”

“Aslan.”

Ash closed his eyes and laughed. “The way you pronounce it is funny,” he said, then before Eiji could flick him, he added, “but I like it. My name . . . it’s one of the few things that I’ve preserved from Dino. And hearing you say it . . . feels nice. Like things can be normal.”

Eiji slipped his fingers between Ash’s, interlacing them. “When all the fighting ends, then . . . then maybe things _ can _ be normal. You can just be Aslan, and I can just be me.”

“Yeah, maybe,” Ash agreed halfheartedly. 

“I am serious,” Eiji insisted. 

Ash laughed, and Eiji wished it wasn’t so dismissive. “Eiji . . . why did you come back?”

“Eh?”

Ash looked Eiji in the eye—looking almost somewhat nervous. “There were so many times you could have gone home. So many times I tried to _ make _ you go home. But you still kept coming back, when you could have been safe. Why?”

The words came to Eiji naturally. “Because you wouldn’t have been there with me.”

Ash’s eyes widened. “I . . . what?”

“_Aslan_,” Eiji said, calmly, factually, “no matter what happens, or what danger I’m in, _ I will always choose you_. Because _ you _ matter more to me than anyone else, Aslan Jade Callanreese.”

Before Eiji knew what was happening, Ash’s arms were around him, and he could have sworn that he could feel Ash’s tears on his shoulder as he shook. “I’m . . . not worth that, Eiji,” he felt Ash whisper into his shirt. 

Eiji hushed him gently. “You are. At least to me.” Eiji paused. “There is a word in English . . . _ soulmate _ . . . there is no exact Japanese word for it, but it describes a not-breaking bond between two people.”

“Unbreakable,” Ash corrected, and Eiji could tell that he was smiling against Eiji’s neck. 

“Yeah,” Eiji agreed, his other hand finding its way to Ash’s hair again. “But there is a word for a bond: _ kizuna_.”

“_Kizuna_,” Ash repeated, and Eiji couldn’t help but smile. “So then I guess our _ kizuna _ is strong?”

“The strongest,” Eiji agreed, resting his head on top of Ash’s. 

They stayed like that for a long while, eventually falling asleep atop each other. 

**Author's Note:**

> Liked this fic? Join the [Discord server](https://discordapp.com/invite/zWdaSaq)!


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